240+ Volkswagen jokes – Funny, Short, Dirty, Long…

|

In
In

240+ Volkswagen jokes – Funny, Short, Dirty, Long…

Share a laugh !

  1. Why did the Volkswagen go to therapy? It had too many issues with its ex-haust.
  2. What do you call a Volkswagen that tells jokes? A Combi-comedian.
  3. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle start a band? It wanted to hit the right “note” on the road.
  4. How do Volkswagens apologize? They Beetle around the bush.
  5. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite type of music? Volks and roll.
  6. Why don’t Volkswagens ever get lost? They always follow their Golf GPS.
  7. What did the Volkswagen say at the comedy show? “I’m here to ‘Passat’ joke around.”
  8. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle apply for a job? It wanted to earn some extra bug money.
  9. What do you call a Volkswagen that’s always running late? A Slowkswagen.
  10. How do Volkswagens prefer to travel? They like to take the scenic “route 66” to the autobahn.
  11. Why was the Volkswagen always calm? It knew how to stay in “mint” condition.
  12. What do Volkswagens use to stay cool in the summer? A Beetle fan.
  13. Why did the Volkswagen go to school? It wanted to get a little more “smart-car” education.
  14. Why do Volkswagens make great detectives? They always find the exhaust port.
  15. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite game? Bug-catching.
  16. Why did the Volkswagen visit the art museum? To see the new “Passat” collection.
  17. What do you call a Volkswagen that’s always in a rush? A Fastwagen.
  18. Why was the Volkswagen the life of the party? It knew how to drive everyone wild.
  19. How do you compliment a Volkswagen? Tell it, “You really auto be proud of yourself!”
  20. What did the Volkswagen Golf say to the Porsche? “I’m in the ‘driver’ seat of my own destiny!”
  1. Why did the Volkswagen bring a ladder to the race? To reach new heights!
  2. What do you call a Volkswagen with a flat tire? A Beetle in need of a lift!
  3. Why was the Volkswagen always invited to picnics? It brought the best “Bus”ketball games!
  4. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite snack? Beetlejuice!
  5. Why did the Volkswagen join the circus? It wanted to be a part of the Bug Top!
  6. How does a Volkswagen flirt? It says, “I’m not just any Bug, I’m a love Bug!”
  7. Why did the Volkswagen break up with the Honda? It couldn’t handle the Accord.
  8. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite sport? Beetlemania wrestling!
  9. How do Volkswagens stay healthy? They follow a strict carburetor diet!
  10. Why don’t Volkswagens ever get sick? They have great V-dub immunity!
  11. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite dessert? Lemon tart, because it turns lemons into mileage!
  12. How do you organize a Volkswagen party? You line them up by type and call it a “VW conga line”!
  13. What did the Volkswagen Golf say to the Audi? “You may be premium, but I’m par for the course!”
  14. Why was the Volkswagen Beetle always smiling? It had a bubbly personality!
  15. Why do Volkswagens never lose at poker? They always know when to fold their convertible tops.
  16. How does a Volkswagen Golf greet a Beetle? “Hey, bug buddy!”
  17. What do you get when you cross a Volkswagen with a computer? A Bug-free software update!
  18. Why did the Volkswagen bring an umbrella? In case of a little drizzle – the Beetle hates to get wet!
  19. Why do Volkswagens love social media? They enjoy being in the V-dub spotlight!
  20. What do you call a Volkswagen that tells time? A clock-swagen!

  1. Why did the Volkswagen bring a ladder to the dealership? To reach new heights in customer satisfaction.
  2. What do you call a Volkswagen that sings in the shower? A Car-aoke master.
  3. Why don’t Volkswagens ever get lost? They always follow the Beetle-juice.
  4. What did the Volkswagen say to the tree? “I’m rooting for you, but let’s not get too close.”
  5. Why did the Volkswagen join the band? It had the best Beetle percussion.
  6. How do Volkswagens stay cool in the summer? They use their Jetta-ble air conditioning.
  7. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite type of story? A turbo-charged tale.
  8. Why did the Volkswagen start a comedy club? It knew how to deliver punchlines on time.
  9. What did the Volkswagen say after a tire blowout? “I guess I’m a little flat today.”
  10. Why do Volkswagens make great detectives? They always follow the Golf course of clues.
  11. What do you call a Volkswagen with a good attitude? A Passat-tive vehicle.
  12. Why did the Volkswagen go to therapy? It needed help with its internal combustion issues.
  13. How do Volkswagens apologize? They say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to Jetta way.”
  14. Why did the Volkswagen always carry a notebook? To jot down all its Touareg secrets.
  15. What do you get when you cross a Volkswagen with a magician? A hatchback abracadabra.
  16. Why was the Volkswagen a great singer? It always hit the right notes with its Polo-r voice.
  17. What did the Volkswagen say to the bicycle? “You wheelie need an upgrade.”
  18. Why did the Volkswagen go to school? To get a little more Passat-tuition.
  19. What do you call a Volkswagen that loves to play games? A Jetta-rrific player.
  20. Why did the Volkswagen refuse to play poker? It didn’t want to deal with a bluff-ing engine.
  1. Why did the Volkswagen go to art class? It wanted to master the Beetle brush strokes.
  2. How do Volkswagens cheer each other up? With a little Jetta-mine.
  3. Why don’t Volkswagens play hide and seek? They always get spotted first.
  4. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite game? Punch Buggy, no returns!
  5. Why did the Volkswagen break up with the bicycle? It couldn’t handle the wheelationship.
  6. What do you call a Volkswagen at the beach? A sun-beetle.
  7. Why did the Volkswagen sit under the tree? It wanted some shade-tree repair.
  8. How does a Volkswagen say goodbye? “I’ll Passat you later.”
  9. What do you get if you cross a Volkswagen and a computer? A microbus with megabytes.
  10. Why did the Volkswagen get an award? For outstanding mileage-stones.
  11. How do Volkswagens stay in shape? They do plenty of car-dio.
  12. Why was the Volkswagen great at chess? It always thought several moves ahead.
  13. What do you call a fancy Volkswagen? A Passat-class vehicle.
  14. Why did the Volkswagen go to the library? To check out some book Beetles.
  15. How do Volkswagens communicate? Through car-networks.
  16. Why did the Volkswagen visit the farm? It wanted to see the Jetta-rson chickens.
  17. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite exercise? Beetle-kicks.
  18. Why are Volkswagens so good at sports? They always stay in gear.
  19. What do you call a Volkswagen with a musical talent? A V-dub maestro.
  20. Why did the Volkswagen bring a map? To find its Golf course.

  1. Why did the Volkswagen start a blog? To keep up with all the “car-toons” it encounters on the road!
  2. What did the Volkswagen say to the high-end sports car? “Don’t worry, buddy, we’ll get there eventually… in style.”
  3. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle bring a ladder to work? It heard it was getting promoted to the ‘top bug’ in the company!
  4. Why did the Volkswagen refuse to play cards? It was afraid of getting ‘dealt’ a bad hand without the right ‘jacks’.
  5. What do you call a Volkswagen at the beach? A ‘Beetle’ that loves to ‘bug’ out in the sun!
  6. Why did the Volkswagen have an umbrella? Because it heard there was a ‘golf’ storm on the way!
  7. Why did the Volkswagen go to therapy? To deal with its mid-life ‘crisis’ of never becoming a ‘Van Gogh’.
  8. Why did the Volkswagen Golf get a scholarship? Because it always stayed on course and never went ‘off-road’!
  9. What do you call a Volkswagen that can play an instrument? A ‘Vantastic’ musician with ‘perfect pitch’!
  10. Why did the Volkswagen bus get into art? It wanted to master the ‘craft’ of getting everyone ‘drawn’ together.
  11. Why did the Volkswagen Jetta take up gardening? To grow its own ‘wheel’ herbs and spices for the perfect drive!
  12. Why did the Volkswagen Passat always win debates? Because it never passed up a chance to make a ‘point’.
  13. What did the Volkswagen Touareg say to the hitchhiker? “Hop in! There’s always room for a good ‘story’ in this ride.”
  14. Why was the Volkswagen dealership so successful? They always had the best ‘sales pitch’ with a smooth ride guarantee!
  15. Why did the Volkswagen Scirocco start a band? To make ‘waves’ in the music industry with its ‘wind-powered’ tunes!
  16. Why did the Volkswagen go to culinary school? To perfect its ‘beet-loaf’ recipe, straight from the ‘bug’ cookbooks.
  17. Why did the Volkswagen Cabrio become a fashion icon? It mastered the art of ‘drop-top’ couture and ‘convertible’ styles.
  18. Why did the Volkswagen Atlas get lost? It was trying to find new ‘roads’ to explore its adventurous spirit!
  19. Why did the Volkswagen Polo start a podcast? To share its ‘driven’ tales from the road with a global audience!
  20. Why did the Volkswagen Arteon take up yoga? To keep its ‘sleek lines’ and ‘flexibility’ in perfect harmony.
  1. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
  2. What do you call a Volkswagen that loves to play hide and seek? A ‘bug’ that’s great at hiding!
  3. Why did the Volkswagen go to school? To get a little ‘beetle’ smarter!
  4. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite game? ‘Car-go’ hide and seek!
  5. Why did the Volkswagen bring a backpack to the beach? To carry all its ‘buggy’ snacks!
  6. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle go to the dentist? Because it had a sweet tooth from too many road ‘candies’!
  7. Why do Volkswagens make great friends? Because they always go the ‘extra mile’ for you!
  8. Why was the Volkswagen so good at baseball? It always ‘bugged’ the other team with its home ‘runs’!
  9. Why did the Volkswagen Golf join the soccer team? Because it’s great at driving the ball into the goal!
  10. Why did the Volkswagen bus bring a sleeping bag to the party? For a ‘bug-tastic’ sleepover!
  11. What do you call a Volkswagen that tells jokes? A ‘funny-buggy’ comedian!
  12. Why did the Volkswagen go to the library? To check out some ‘car-tastic’ books!
  13. Why do Volkswagen cars never get lost? Because they always follow the ‘beetle’ tracks!
  14. Why did the Volkswagen take a nap? It needed to recharge its ‘bug-ergy’!
  15. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle paint itself red? To become a ‘cherry-ful’ bug!
  16. Why did the Volkswagen go to the zoo? To see the ‘bugtastic’ creatures!
  17. What do you call a Volkswagen with a surfboard? A ‘beach buggy’ ready to catch some waves!
  18. Why did the Volkswagen play music so loud? To start a ‘car-toon’ concert!
  19. Why do Volkswagen cars love puzzles? Because they’re great at ‘piecing’ things together!
  20. What do you get when you mix a Volkswagen and a magic trick? A ‘beetle-icious’ surprise!

  1. Why did the Volkswagen go to therapy? It had too many ‘beetle’ issues to handle on its own.
  2. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite type of music? Classic ‘rock-n-road’!
  3. Why did the Volkswagen Golf bring a suitcase to the office? Because it’s always ready for a quick ‘drive’ to success!
  4. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle become an accountant? It’s great at keeping ‘track’ of every mile and expense.
  5. Why do Volkswagens make the best comedians? Because they always deliver a punchline with ‘driving’ force!
  6. Why did the Volkswagen Passat take up meditation? To find its inner ‘peace’ on the road.
  7. Why did the Volkswagen Jetta get a promotion? Because it always knew how to ‘shift’ gears and take charge!
  8. Why did the Volkswagen Touareg go to the spa? To get a well-deserved ‘tune-up’ and relax.
  9. What did the Volkswagen say to the Tesla? “Sure, you’re electric, but can you handle the ‘bugs’ in the road?”
  10. Why did the Volkswagen start a garden? To grow its own ‘bug-free’ organic produce.
  11. Why did the Volkswagen take a detour? To find the scenic route and avoid ‘auto’ stress.
  12. What do you call a Volkswagen that’s always late? A ‘beetle’ that likes to take its time ‘bugging’ around.
  13. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle write a novel? To document its ‘epic’ road trip adventures.
  14. Why did the Volkswagen Golf join a gym? To work on its ‘car-dio’ and stay in top shape!
  15. Why did the Volkswagen bus start a podcast? To share ‘driven’ stories and interviews from the open road.
  16. Why do Volkswagens never get bored? Because they always have a new ‘journey’ to embark on.
  17. Why did the Volkswagen attend a wine tasting? To enjoy a refined experience and maybe a little ‘car-bination’!
  18. Why did the Volkswagen Cabriolet join a theater group? To perfect its ‘convertible’ performance skills.
  19. Why did the Volkswagen Atlas become a life coach? Because it’s great at guiding others through life’s twists and turns.
  20. Why did the Volkswagen Arteon take up painting? To capture the ‘art’ of driving in every brushstroke.
  1. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle blush? It saw the traffic light turn red and thought it was being stopped for speeding!
  2. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite exercise? Car-dio!
  3. Why don’t Volkswagens ever get lost? They always follow the ‘beetle’ signs!
  4. Why did the Volkswagen go to school? To get a little ‘beetle’ smarter!
  5. How do Volkswagens keep cool in the summer? They drive with their ‘windows’ down!
  6. What do you call a Volkswagen that tells jokes? A ‘funny-buggy’!
  7. Why did the Volkswagen cross the road? To prove it wasn’t ‘chicken’!
  8. Why did the Volkswagen bring a ladder to the bar? Because it heard the drinks were on the house!
  9. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite type of music? Beetle-mania!
  10. Why did the Volkswagen break up with its GPS? It couldn’t handle the constant ‘recalculating’ in their relationship.
  11. Why did the Volkswagen bring a map to the party? It didn’t want to take any ‘wrong turns’ in conversation.
  12. Why do Volkswagens never get tired? Because they’re always ‘wheel-y’ excited to go on a drive!
  13. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite meal? A full tank of gas with a side of ‘road’ chips!
  14. Why did the Volkswagen bring a flashlight? To light up its ‘headlights’!
  15. Why was the Volkswagen good at art? Because it knew how to draw a crowd!
  16. Why don’t Volkswagens tell secrets? Because they might ‘leak’ information!
  17. How do you make a Volkswagen laugh? Give it a little ‘gas’!
  18. What did the Volkswagen say to the slow driver? “Quit ‘draggin’ your wheels!”
  19. Why did the Volkswagen go to the gym? To get a little ‘tire-d’ out!
  20. Why did the Volkswagen apply for a job? It wanted to ‘drive’ its career forward!

  1. Why did the Volkswagen bring string cheese to the picnic? It wanted to make some ‘cheesy’ friends!
  2. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite movie genre? Anything with a lot of ‘car-toons’!
  3. Why did the Volkswagen take up knitting? It wanted to make its own ‘car-digans’!
  4. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle go to the comedy club? It needed a good ‘laugh-n-drive’!
  5. What did the Volkswagen say to the gas pump? “Fill ‘er up, I’m feeling a bit ‘tanked’ today!”
  6. Why did the Volkswagen bring a notebook to the road trip? To jot down some ‘mile-stones’!
  7. Why did the Volkswagen refuse to play hide and seek? It didn’t want to be a ‘beetle’ in hiding!
  8. Why was the Volkswagen always invited to parties? Because it knew how to ‘drive’ the fun!
  9. Why did the Volkswagen bring an extra tire? Just in case it needed to ‘wheel’ and deal!
  10. What did the Volkswagen say when it finished a race? “That was a ‘wheely’ good time!”
  11. Why did the Volkswagen Beetle get a new paint job? It wanted to be the ‘beet’ of the party!
  12. Why did the Volkswagen Golf get so good at golf? It mastered the art of the ‘drive’!
  13. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite dance move? The ‘car-shuffle’!
  14. Why did the Volkswagen start a band? To play some ‘tire-rific’ tunes!
  15. Why was the Volkswagen so good at soccer? Because it always ‘goals’ for the win!
  16. Why did the Volkswagen get a job at the bakery? To make some ‘dough’ on the side!
  17. What’s a Volkswagen’s favorite dessert? Car-amel pudding!
  18. Why did the Volkswagen join the circus? To become the best ‘car-neval’ attraction!
  19. Why did the Volkswagen go to space? To see if there’s ‘life’ in the fast lane!
  20. What did the Volkswagen say when it broke down? “Looks like I’m in a real ‘jam’ this time!”

Share a laugh !

Hit me up on socials :

Leave a Comment