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1. Why did the legume go to school? Because it wanted to be a pea-sful student!
2. What do you call a paranoid legume? A neurotic nut!
3. Why did the chickpea break up with the lentil? It said, “You’re not my type, you’re too lentil-lectual.”
4. Why did the legume go to therapy? Because it had too many pea-nuts in its brain!
5. Why don’t legumes ever get lost? Because they always have bean there before!
6. What’s a legume’s favorite type of music? Pea-no!
7. Why did the legume get promoted? Because it was soy good at its job!
8. What do you call a legume who loves to dance? A soy-shaker!
9. Why did the legume refuse to fight? It didn’t want to pea-k a fight!
10. Why don’t legumes ever argue? Because they always see eye to pea!
11. Why was the legume always invited to parties? Because it was a real pea-ce maker!
12. What’s a legume’s favorite sport? Soy-cer!
13. Why was the legume so trustworthy? Because it never spilled the beans!
14. Why did the legume become an actor? It wanted to be in the lima-light!
15. What did the legume say to the farmer? “Lettuce turnip the beet!”
16. Why was the legume such a good comedian? Because it knew how to split peas!
17. Why did the legume get a job at the bakery? Because it was knead-ed for the dough!
18. What’s a legume’s favorite superhero? The Incredible Hullk!
19. Why was the legume so calm during storms? It had a pea-ceful demeanor!
20. What did the legume say to the treadmill? “Lentil go any faster!”

1. Why did the legume go to the party? It heard there would be bean dip!
2. What do you call a legume with a sense of humor? A pun-gent pea!
3. Why was the legume always the life of the potluck? Because it knew how to split peas!
4. How do legumes stay in shape? They do bean exercises!
5. Why did the legume start a band? Because it had great bean-tuition!
6. What’s a legume’s favorite type of movie? A chick-flick pea!
7. Why don’t legumes ever win at poker? Because they always give away their tell: they’re nuts!
8. What did the legume say when it won the lottery? “I’m gonna pea all over town!”
9. Why did the legume refuse to fight? It didn’t want to be a soy loser!
10. How do legumes communicate? They use a pea-ter!
11. Why did the legume bring a ladder to the garden? To help the beans climb to the top!
12. What did one legume say to the other during a race? “Lettuce beets the peas out of here!”
13. Why did the legume refuse to share its secrets? It said, “I’m not spilling the beans!”
14. Why was the legume always chosen to lead? Because it had natural born lea-der beans!
15. What’s a legume’s favorite party game? Split-pea soup charades!
16. Why did the legume take up knitting? Because it wanted to make beanies!
17. How does a legume apologize? It says, “I’m soy-rry!”
18. What’s a legume’s favorite game show? Family Pea-d!
19. Why did the legume become a detective? Because it loved to uncover bean mysteries!
20. What did the legume say to the bicycle? “Lentil me ride!”

1. Why was the legume considered a genius? Because it had a pea-sized brain but a bean-sized intellect!
2. What’s a legume’s favorite subject in school? Advanced bean-ometry!
3. Why did the legume become a philosopher? Because it pondered the meaning of life in a nutshell!
4. How did the legume solve complex problems? It used its noodle… bean!
5. Why was the legume the smartest in its pod? Because it knew the difference between a punnet square and a punnet of peas!
6. What’s a legume’s favorite book genre? Bean-ography!
7. Why was the legume always at the top of its class? It knew how to bean-d the rules!
8. How did the legume become a math wizard? It mastered the art of bean counting!
9. What did the legume say to its algebra teacher? “Quit being so square, let’s talk about bean functions!”
10. Why did the legume enroll in a coding class? It wanted to learn how to bean a programmer!
11. How did the legume excel in physics? It understood the principles of bean gravity!
12. What’s a legume’s favorite hobby? String bean theory!
13. Why did the legume become a chess champion? It knew how to move its peas strategically!
14. How did the legume ace its biology exam? It knew everything from pea to zygote!
15. Why did the legume start a debate club? Because it loved to argue its point until it was soy-lid!
16. What’s a legume’s favorite historical era? The Age of Enlightenment, of course – when beans were considered leguminaries!
17. Why was the legume considered an intellectual heavyweight? Because it never shied away from bean-y discussions!
18. How did the legume become a crossword puzzle expert? It was a master at bean-swer clues!
19. Why was the legume’s IQ off the charts? Because it had a legu-mind as sharp as a knife!
20. What did the legume say to the skeptical scientist? “Don’t be pea-brained, my intelligence is scientifically proven!”

1. Why was the legume always invited to parties? Because it knew how to pea-k everyone’s interest!
2. What do you call a legume in a hurry? A sprinting split pea!
3. Why did the legume break up with the carrot? It said, “You’re not my type, you’re too carroty!”
4. What did the legume say to the chef? “Don’t soy with me, I’m already seasoned!”
5. Why did the legume bring a ladder to the garden? To reach the high beans!
6. What’s a legume’s favorite TV show? Pea-ky Blinders!
7. Why did the legume go to the beach? It wanted to see the tide roll in and out… of peas!
8. What did the legume say when it won the race? “I’m pod-ium material!”
9. Why was the legume always picked first for sports teams? Because it had great bean-ticipation!
10. What did the legume say to the mirror? “Bean there, done that!”
11. Why did the legume go to the concert? It heard it would be a jam session!
12. What’s a legume’s favorite place to shop? The bean market!
13. Why did the legume get a job at the bakery? Because it was knead-ed for the dough!
14. What did the legume say to the refrigerator? “Peas let me in, I’m cool beans!”
15. Why was the legume always calm during exams? Because it had bean-th of knowledge!
16. What did one legume say to the other on a hot day? “We’re really roasting out here!”
17. Why did the legume become a comedian? Because it could crack the toughest nut with its jokes!
18. What’s a legume’s favorite movie genre? Bean flicks!
19. Why was the legume such a good dancer? It had great bean moves!
20. What did the legume say to the carrot who wanted to race? “You’re just gonna get beet!”

1. Why did the legume take up gardening? Because it wanted to grow up to be a real ‘bean’ stalk!
2. What did the legume say to its crush? “You make my heart go ‘pitter-pea’!”
3. Why don’t legumes ever get lost? Because they always ‘know bean’ navigation!
4. How did the legume win the race? It used its ‘split pea’ powers to zoom past the finish line!
5. Why did the legume go to school? To become a ‘wise bean’!
6. What did the legume say to the comedian? “You’re a real ‘joke-pea’!”
7. Why was the legume always happy? Because it had a ‘bean-tastic’ outlook on life!
8. What did the legume say when it won the lottery? “I’m ‘bean’-tastically rich!”
9. Why did the legume go to the beach? To work on its ‘bean’ tan!
10. Why did the legume become a musician? Because it had a ‘pea-riffic’ talent!
11. How did the legume become famous? It starred in its own ‘pea-licious’ cooking show!
12. Why did the legume refuse to fight? Because it was a ‘pea-ceful’ soul!
13. What did the legume say to the weightlifter? “You’re really ‘bean-strength’!”
14. Why did the legume get a job in construction? It wanted to be a ‘bean’ counter!
15. How does a legume keep its cool? It stays in the ‘chill pea’ zone!
16. What’s a legume’s favorite movie genre? ‘Pea-ctacular’ adventures!
17. Why did the legume become an artist? Because it had a ‘pea-nomenal’ sense of creativity!
18. What did the legume say to the haters? “I don’t care, I’m still a ‘bean’ of worth!”
19. Why did the legume go on a diet? It wanted to be a ‘lean, mean, pea-eating’ machine!
20. How did the legume become a detective? It had a knack for ‘un-pea-lievable’ mysteries!

1. Why did the legume bring a pencil to school? Because it wanted to draw ‘pea-portraits’!
2. What did the legume say to its friends at the playground? “Let’s play ‘hide and pea’!”
3. How do legume kids learn to count? They practice with ‘bean’ counters!
4. Why did the legume refuse to play hide-and-seek? Because it was afraid it might ‘pea-k’ too soon!
5. What did the legume say when it fell down? “I’ve bean tripped up!”
6. Why did the legume bring a ladder to school? It wanted to reach the ‘bean-stalk’!
7. How did the legume kid impress its friends? By telling ‘bean’-utiful jokes!
8. What did the legume kid do at the party? It danced the ‘pea-p’ dance!
9. Why did the legume kid go to the library? To check out some ‘bean’-tastic books!
10. What’s a legume kid’s favorite subject? ‘Pea’rithmetic!
11. Why did the legume kid wear sunglasses? To protect its ‘pea-sized’ eyes from the sun!
12. What did the legume kid say to its sibling? “You’re my ‘pea’-rfect partner in crime!”
13. How did the legume kid help in the kitchen? By being the ‘pea-lper’ chef!
14. Why did the legume kid bring a map to school? To find the ‘pea-k’ of knowledge!
15. What’s a legume kid’s favorite game? ‘Pea’-pong!
16. Why did the legume kid climb a tree? To reach the ‘top of the pea-p’!
17. What did the legume kid say to the dentist? “I promise to brush my ‘pea’-rlies!”
18. Why did the legume kid bring a blanket to school? To have a ‘pea’-ceful nap time!
19. How did the legume kid become a superhero? By eating its ‘pea’-superfoods!
20. What did the legume kid say to its parents? “You’re the ‘pea’-rents of my dreams!”

1. Why did the legume go to therapy? Because it had a lot of peas on its mind.
2. What did the flirtatious legume say to the bean? “Hey, wanna split?”
3. Why was the chickpea always the life of the party? Because it knew how to hummuself!
4. Why did the soybean blush? Because it saw the chickpea chickpea-dancing in its shell.
5. What do you call two legumes in love? A peasful relationship.
6. Why don’t legumes ever argue? Because they know how to compromise – they’re peas makers.
7. How did the lentil feel after a breakup? It was feeling pretty split.
8. Why did the legume break up with the carrot? Because it found someone butter.
9. What did the bean say to the lentil during an argument? “Stop splitting hairs!”
10. Why was the peanut afraid to tell its secrets? It was scared they would be leguminated.
11. What did the legume say to its lover on Valentine’s Day? “You’re the butter to my bean.”
12. Why did the legume go to the gym? It wanted to work on its “pea”cks.
13. What do you call a legume who’s a great storyteller? A bean-counter.
14. Why did the pea blush? Because it saw the chickpea naked!
15. What did the soybean say to the chickpea? “You’re so edamamezing.”
16. Why did the legume go to the party? It heard it was going to be shell of a good time!
17. Why did the lentil refuse to fight? Because it was a pacifist – it preferred peaseful resolutions.
18. Why did the legume start a band? Because it wanted to pea-ce together some tunes.
19. What did the chickpea say to the kidney bean? “You’re so a-maize-ing.”
20. Why was the bean always calm? Because it had a very pea-ceful demeanor.

1. Why did the legume go to school? Because it wanted to be a “bean” of knowledge!
2. What do you call a nervous legume? A chickpea-shooter!
3. Why don’t legumes ever get lost? Because they always know their pea-way!
4. Why was the legume always calm during exams? Because it had bean studying!
5. How did the legume propose? With a pea-ring!
6. What did the legume say to its sweetheart? “You mean the bean-st to me!”
7. Why was the legume so good at math? Because it knew its bean-counting!
8. What’s a legume’s favorite music genre? Pea-hop!
9. Why did the legume break up with the beanstalk? It wasn’t their type – they needed space!
10. How does a legume apologize? It says, “I’m soy-rry!”
11. What’s a legume’s favorite TV show? “Game of Peas”!
12. Why did the legume go to therapy? It had too many split-pea-sonalities!
13. What’s a legume’s favorite superhero? Captain America-nus!
14. Why did the legume bring a ladder to the party? It heard the chips were going to be extra dippy!
15. How does a legume make a decision? It peas together all the options!
16. Why did the legume get promoted? Because it always rose to the occasion – bean there, done that!
17. What’s a legume’s favorite sport? Broadbean jumping!
18. Why was the legume always a hit at parties? It had a great “peas”ence!
19. How does a legume make friends? It starts with a “bean” of conversation!
20. What did the legume say to the chef? “You’re really pea-rific at what you do!”

1. Why did the legume never get into a fight? Because it was too cheesy to bean aggressive!
2. What did the legume say when it won the lottery? “I’m going to be a real cashew nut now!”
3. Why did the legume refuse to play cards? Because it was afraid of the “joker” beans!
4. How does a legume celebrate a promotion? With a big cheesy grin and a side of “brie-lieve in myself”!
5. What did the legume say to the jokester? “You’re really pea-larious!”
6. Why did the legume refuse to run in the race? It didn’t want to be caught in a cheesy situation!
7. How does a legume greet its friends? With a big cheesy hug!
8. Why did the legume go to the art museum? It heard there were some “gouda” paintings!
9. What’s a legume’s favorite pickup line? “Are you a legume? Because you make my heart bean faster!”
10. Why was the legume always in demand? Because it was the “cheddar” of attention!
11. How does a legume apologize for being late? It says, “I’m sorry, I had a cheesy excuse!”
12. What did the legume say when it won the dance competition? “I’ve got some real gouda moves!”
13. Why did the legume start a band? Because it wanted to be the “string cheese” lead singer!
14. How does a legume prepare for a date? It practices its cheesy lines in front of the mirror!
15. Why did the legume get a job as a comedian? Because it could always bring the “grate” jokes!
16. What did the legume say to the pessimist? “Stop being so cheesy, let’s brie happy together!”
17. Why did the legume become a teacher? It wanted to spread its cheesy knowledge to the next generation!
18. How does a legume stay warm in the winter? With a big cheesy blanket!
19. What did the legume say when it won the award? “I’d like to thank all my cheesy supporters!”
20. Why was the legume always invited to parties? Because it knew how to turnip the cheesy fun!

Share a laugh !