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1. The kind of guy who brings a portable charger to parties instead of snacks.
2. The kind of guy who thinks a 10-minute conversation counts as deep emotional bonding.
3. The kind of guy who believes his gym selfies are his greatest contribution to society.
4. The kind of guy who uses “bro” as punctuation in every sentence.
5. The kind of guy who thinks he’s a master chef because he can make toast without burning it.
6. The kind of guy who wears sunglasses indoors and at night to “protect his eyes from the haters.”
7. The kind of guy who considers himself a fashion icon because he matched his socks to his shirt once.
8. The kind of guy who thinks holding the door open for two seconds entitles him to a Nobel Peace Prize.
9. The kind of guy who names his biceps and refers to them as his “partners in crime.”
10. The kind of guy who takes longer to do his hair than to respond to a text message.
11. The kind of guy who measures his self-worth by the number of likes on his Instagram posts.
12. The kind of guy who believes his horoscope dictates his life more than his own decisions.
13. The kind of guy who thinks owning a plant makes him an environmental activist.
14. The kind of guy who uses “YOLO” as justification for every reckless decision.
15. The kind of guy who considers his fantasy football team more important than world politics.
16. The kind of guy who thinks the gym is a suitable substitute for therapy.
17. The kind of guy who spends more time perfecting his Fortnite dance moves than his actual dance skills.
18. The kind of guy who believes wearing a fedora automatically makes him sophisticated.
19. The kind of guy who’s convinced his pickup lines are pure poetry.
20. The kind of guy who thinks a “dad bod” is just another term for “sex appeal.”

1. The kind of guy who sets his alarm for 6 am and hits snooze until noon.
2. The kind of guy who thinks he’s a comedian because he can recite every line from “The Office.”
3. The kind of guy who wears socks with sandals and calls it a fashion statement.
4. The kind of guy who takes longer to choose a Netflix movie than to watch it.
5. The kind of guy who dances like no one’s watching, even though everyone’s watching and cringing.
6. The kind of guy who thinks he’s a DIY expert but ends up calling a professional to fix his “repairs.”
7. The kind of guy who believes he’s a connoisseur of fine dining because he can microwave a frozen dinner.
8. The kind of guy who tries to impress people with his “deep” philosophical insights from YouTube videos.
9. The kind of guy who thinks he’s a master of romance because he once bought flowers from a gas station.
10. The kind of guy who considers himself a tech genius because he can reset the Wi-Fi router.
11. The kind of guy who thinks he’s a smooth operator because he knows how to use emojis in every text message.
12. The kind of guy who takes selfies in public places and pretends he’s not aware of the stares.
13. The kind of guy who thinks he’s an expert on world affairs because he read a headline on Twitter.
14. The kind of guy who believes his karaoke rendition of “Wonderwall” can heal broken hearts.
15. The kind of guy who insists on telling “dad jokes” even though he’s not a dad and no one finds them funny.
16. The kind of guy who thinks his cat is plotting world domination and shares conspiracy theories about it.
17. The kind of guy who uses air quotes so frequently that he’s considering them for his next tattoo.
18. The kind of guy who thinks he’s a detective because he once found his keys after 30 minutes of searching.
19. The kind of guy who believes he’s a health guru because he drinks a kale smoothie once a month.
20. The kind of guy who thinks his “dad bod” is just a warm-up for his eventual “father figure” status.

1. The kind of guy who brings a compass to a grocery store because he heard they have good direction.
2. The kind of guy who calls his pet fish “bait” because he’s always fishing for compliments.
3. The kind of guy who wears sunglasses indoors because he’s shady.
4. The kind of guy who buys a ladder to take his selfies to a higher level.
5. The kind of guy who carries around a map of the world just in case someone asks him where he’s been all his life.
6. The kind of guy who brings a spoon to a knife fight because he’s always ready for a stirring debate.
7. The kind of guy who thinks “Ctrl + Alt + Delete” is the answer to all life’s problems.
8. The kind of guy who wears a tie to the gym because he likes to “work out” his professional image.
9. The kind of guy who puts his phone on airplane mode and expects it to fly.
10. The kind of guy who asks for a “rain check” when it’s not even raining.
11. The kind of guy who brings a pillow to a concert because he likes to rock and roll.
12. The kind of guy who thinks a password is something you yell at your computer when it’s not working.
13. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to a job interview because he heard it’s a deep conversation.
14. The kind of guy who puts his car keys in the fridge to cool down his hot ride.
15. The kind of guy who thinks a balanced diet means a burger in each hand.
16. The kind of guy who brings a mirror to the beach to show the waves what they’re missing.
17. The kind of guy who thinks “Bluetooth” is a dental condition.
18. The kind of guy who carries around a plant for photosynthesis because he heard it’s a bright idea.
19. The kind of guy who wears a belt with a watch on it because he likes to “waist” time.
20. The kind of guy who brings a calculator to a party because he likes to crunch numbers.

1. The kind of guy who brings a ladder to a bar because he heard the drinks are on the top shelf.
2. The kind of guy who wears a raincoat indoors because he’s always prepared for a “shower” of compliments.
3. The kind of guy who carries a map to the gym because he’s lost in his workout routine.
4. The kind of guy who brings a pillow to a movie theater because he likes to dream big on the big screen.
5. The kind of guy who wears sunglasses at night because he’s “blinded by the spotlight” of his own charisma.
6. The kind of guy who thinks a “LAN party” is where you go to play hide and seek.
7. The kind of guy who brings a snorkel to a pool party because he heard it’s a “deep” social event.
8. The kind of guy who wears a suit to a barbecue because he’s all about that “grill” lifestyle.
9. The kind of guy who brings a calculator to a date because he likes to “count” his blessings.
10. The kind of guy who thinks “WiFi” is short for “Wireless Fidelity,” so he tries to be faithful to his internet connection.
11. The kind of guy who brings a telescope to a fireworks show because he’s always looking for “star” attractions.
12. The kind of guy who wears a tie to a beach party because he likes to “surf” the waves of fashion.
13. The kind of guy who carries around a chessboard because he’s always ready for a “checkmate” moment.
14. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel in the bathtub because he likes to make a “splash.”
15. The kind of guy who brings a compass to a picnic because he’s always “heading in the right direction” with his snacks.
16. The kind of guy who wears a watch on each wrist because he likes to be “double” on time.
17. The kind of guy who brings a ruler to a concert because he’s all about measuring the “decibels” of the music.
18. The kind of guy who wears a backpack to a buffet because he’s ready to “pack” in the calories.
19. The kind of guy who brings a fishing rod to a wedding because he’s always “angling” for a good time.
20. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to a hot tub because he’s ready to dive into relaxation.

1. The kind of guy who tried to catch fog yesterday but mist.
2. The kind of guy who went to the doctor because he was feeling a little horse. The doctor told him he was just a little hoarse.
3. The kind of guy who thought he could be a professional baker, but he couldn’t make enough dough.
4. The kind of guy who told everyone he’s reading a book on anti-gravity, but it’s impossible to put down.
5. The kind of guy who went to the zoo and saw a sign that said “Don’t feed the animals,” so he went home and ate his lunch.
6. The kind of guy who tried to make a belt out of watches, but he realized it was a waist of time.
7. The kind of guy who wanted to become a vegetarian, but he couldn’t find any vegetables he liked beef.
8. The kind of guy who tried to organize a hide-and-seek tournament, but it was hard to find players who could hide well.
9. The kind of guy who thought about becoming a baker, but he couldn’t make enough dough.
10. The kind of guy who tried to become a professional fisherman, but he couldn’t live on his net income.
11. The kind of guy who tried to become a comedian, but he just couldn’t get his jokes to land.
12. The kind of guy who thought about becoming a baker, but he didn’t have enough knead for it.
13. The kind of guy who went to the beach and tried to surf, but he got tide down.
14. The kind of guy who tried to become a math teacher, but he couldn’t count on his students.
15. The kind of guy who wanted to become a gardener, but he didn’t have enough thyme.
16. The kind of guy who wanted to become a professional athlete, but he couldn’t get his life together to train.
17. The kind of guy who tried to become a photographer, but he just couldn’t focus.
18. The kind of guy who wanted to become a musician, but he couldn’t find the right note.
19. The kind of guy who wanted to become a chef, but he couldn’t handle the heat in the kitchen.
20. The kind of guy who wanted to become a painter, but he couldn’t brush up on his skills.

1. The kind of guy who tried to teach his dog to bark in Spanish, but all it learned was “woof-hola.”
2. The kind of guy who wears socks with sandals because he likes to keep his toes in suspense.
3. The kind of guy who tried to make a snowman out of rain, but all he got was a wet hat.
4. The kind of guy who brings a snorkel to a swimming pool because he heard it’s a deep end conversation.
5. The kind of guy who thought he could fly by jumping off his bed with a cape, but he just ended up with a bump on his head.
6. The kind of guy who tried to water his plants with sports drinks because he thought they needed electrolytes.
7. The kind of guy who puts his alarm clock in the freezer so he can have a cool wake-up call.
8. The kind of guy who brings a flashlight to the beach because he heard there might be a light breeze.
9. The kind of guy who wears a tie to the playground because he likes to “swing” in style.
10. The kind of guy who tries to take a selfie with a fish because he heard it’s the perfect catch.
11. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to a job interview because he wants to dive into the opportunity.
12. The kind of guy who brings a pillow to school because he’s always dreaming of a nap.
13. The kind of guy who wears a backpack to a buffet because he’s always prepared for a food adventure.
14. The kind of guy who brings a suitcase to the park because he’s ready for a trip down slide lane.
15. The kind of guy who puts his homework in the fridge to cool down his brain after studying.
16. The kind of guy who brings a map to the movies because he heard it’s a blockbuster.
17. The kind of guy who wears a helmet to a party because he likes to protect his ideas.
18. The kind of guy who brings a compass to a birthday party because he heard they have good direction.
19. The kind of guy who brings a ruler to a concert because he wants to measure the sound waves.
20. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to the library because he heard it’s a deep read.

1. The kind of guy who brings a bottle opener to a wedding because he knows how to start a party.
2. The kind of guy who wears a tie to a barbecue because he likes to “grill” in style.
3. The kind of guy who tries to impress his date by ordering wine in sign language, but he ends up with a bottle of vinegar.
4. The kind of guy who brings a notepad to a bar because he’s always jotting down “spirited” ideas.
5. The kind of guy who brings a chessboard to a nightclub because he likes to make strategic moves.
6. The kind of guy who wears a suit to a beach party because he’s “shore” of himself.
7. The kind of guy who brings a briefcase to a coffee shop because he’s on a grind.
8. The kind of guy who tries to impress his date with his knowledge of fine dining, but he ends up ordering “filet o’ fish” at a fancy restaurant.
9. The kind of guy who brings a calculator to a dinner party because he likes to “sum” things up.
10. The kind of guy who wears a fedora to a sports game because he’s a fan of “hat” tricks.
11. The kind of guy who brings a book to a nightclub because he’s looking for a “novel” experience.
12. The kind of guy who tries to impress his date with his cooking skills, but he sets off the fire alarm while making toast.
13. The kind of guy who wears a monocle to a movie theater because he likes to “focus” on the details.
14. The kind of guy who brings a map to a rooftop party because he likes to elevate the conversation.
15. The kind of guy who tries to impress his date with his knowledge of art, but he mistakes a Picasso for a pizza.
16. The kind of guy who wears a pocket square to a pool party because he likes to stay dry-humored.
17. The kind of guy who brings a thesaurus to a bar because he likes to “expand” his vocabulary.
18. The kind of guy who tries to impress his date with his fancy cocktail-making skills, but he ends up spilling the drinks all over the floor.
19. The kind of guy who wears a suit to a hiking trip because he’s ready to “summit” the challenge.
20. The kind of guy who brings a pen and paper to a wine tasting because he’s a connoisseur of notes.

1. The kind of guy who wears socks with sandals and proudly proclaims, “I’m bringing back the sock-tan trend!”
2. The kind of guy who tells everyone he’s reading a book on anti-gravity, but he just can’t seem to put it down.
3. The kind of guy who orders a chicken and an egg online. He’ll let you know which comes first.
4. The kind of guy who thinks a joke is a success if it makes him laugh, even if no one else does.
5. The kind of guy who always carries a dad joke survival kit: a fanny pack filled with puns and a spare pair of New Balance sneakers.
6. The kind of guy who puts his car keys in the fridge to cool down his “hot” ride.
7. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I’ll call you later,” and then pretends to dial a banana.
8. The kind of guy who tells everyone he’s on a seafood diet. “I see food, and I eat it!”
9. The kind of guy who brings a lawn chair to a concert because he likes to “rock” in comfort.
10. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I’m not just a dad; I’m a father figure… skater.”
11. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.”
12. The kind of guy who wears a belt with a watch on it because he likes to “waist” time.
13. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.”
14. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I’m reading a book on anti-gravity, but it’s so uplifting!”
15. The kind of guy who asks his kids if they’ve heard about the kidnapping at the playground. “It’s okay; he woke up.”
16. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I thought about going on an all-almond diet, but that’s just nuts.”
17. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I’m reading a book on anti-gravity, but it’s impossible to put down.”
18. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”
19. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I’m reading a book on anti-gravity, but it’s really weighing me down.”
20. The kind of guy who tells his kids, “I thought about going on a diet, but I’m just too heavy.”

1. The kind of guy who brings a ladder to a bar because he heard the drinks are on the top shelf.
2. The kind of guy who wears sunglasses at night because he’s too cool for the moonlight.
3. The kind of guy who tells his friends he’s going to a seafood party, but he’s just going to “krill” time.
4. The kind of guy who wears a cape to a job interview because he’s ready to “super” impress.
5. The kind of guy who brings a pillow to a party because he’s always ready to “pillow-fight.”
6. The kind of guy who brings a map to a dance club because he’s always looking for the “right direction.”
7. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to a meeting because he’s diving into business.
8. The kind of guy who brings a rubber duck to a pool party because he’s “quacking” up.
9. The kind of guy who wears a top hat to a baseball game because he’s hoping for a “home run.”
10. The kind of guy who brings a calculator to a party because he’s always crunching numbers.
11. The kind of guy who wears a tie to a beach party because he’s ready to “tide” up.
12. The kind of guy who brings a suitcase to a restaurant because he’s “packing” a big appetite.
13. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to a coffee shop because he’s looking for a “deep brew.”
14. The kind of guy who brings a broom to a party because he’s ready to sweep someone off their feet.
15. The kind of guy who wears a tuxedo to a fast-food restaurant because he’s “fancy feasting.”
16. The kind of guy who brings a mirror to a concert because he wants to “reflect” on the music.
17. The kind of guy who wears a bow tie to a gym because he’s ready to “tie” himself to fitness.
18. The kind of guy who brings a pillow to a movie theater because he’s ready for a “pillow talk.”
19. The kind of guy who wears a snorkel to a wedding because he’s diving into love.
20. The kind of guy who brings a map to a party because he’s always ready for an adventure.

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