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1. Why did the skeleton refuse to go to the hospital? Because he didn’t have the guts for it!
2. What do you call a doctor who fixes websites? A URLologist!
3. Why was the math book sad in the hospital? Because it had too many problems!
4. Why did the nurse carry a red pen to work? In case she needed to draw blood!
5. Why did the doctor carry a ladder? Because he wanted to take his practice to the next level!
6. Why did the germ go to school? To get a little culture!
7. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
8. Why did the nurse carry a pencil? In case she needed to draw blood!
9. Why did the nurse carry a glass of water? In case she needed to take her medicine!
10. Why did the doctor break up with his dentist girlfriend? She was always giving him the cold shoulder!
11. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
12. Why did the nurse always carry a red pen? In case she needed to draw blood!
13. Why did the germ cross the microscope? To get to the other slide!
14. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? Because he had no body to go with him!
15. Why did the doctor carry a stethoscope? Because he wanted to listen to some beats!
16. Why did the germ go to school? Because it wanted to be a little cultured!
17. Why did the nurse always carry a watch? In case she needed to take someone’s pulse!
18. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
19. Why did the germ go to school? To get a little cultured!
20. Why did the doctor carry a stethoscope? Because he wanted to listen to some beats!

1. Why did the doctor always carry a map in the hospital? Because he wanted to find his patients’ “ill-land”!
2. Why was the nurse always calm in the operating room? She had a lot of patients!
3. Why did the skeleton go to the hospital? It had a broken funny bone!
4. Why did the MRI machine break up with the X-ray machine? They couldn’t see eye to eye!
5. Why was the doctor always calm during surgery? He knew how to stay “organ”-ized!
6. Why did the nurse always bring a ladder to work? She wanted to raise the patients’ spirits!
7. Why did the hospital hire a gardener? To help with all the “bed” pans!
8. Why did the thermometer break up with the graduated cylinder? They just couldn’t measure up to each other!
9. Why did the surgeon bring a baseball glove to the operating room? He was prepared for any “catch”!
10. Why was the stethoscope such a great detective? It always got to the heart of the matter!
11. Why did the nurse bring a pencil to work? In case she needed to “draw” some blood!
12. Why was the hospital cafeteria so busy? They had a lot of “bandage” to-go orders!
13. Why did the doctor carry a dictionary? To check the “meaning” of every symptom!
14. Why was the MRI machine so good at keeping secrets? It had a lot of “MRI-lids”!
15. Why did the nurse always carry a mirror? To reflect on her patients’ conditions!
16. Why was the doctor always good at math? Because he had a lot of patients to “count” on!
17. Why did the skeleton refuse to go to the hospital? It had no guts for it!
18. Why did the germ go to medical school? It wanted to be a “cell”-ebrated doctor!
19. Why did the X-ray machine break down? It couldn’t handle the “pressure”!
20. Why did the hospital hire a DJ? To keep the patients in “good beats”!

1. Why did the doctor always carry a thesaurus? To find the “right” words to diagnose!
2. Why was the hospital cafeteria’s food never cold? Because it was always under “constant care”!
3. Why did the surgeon become a comedian? Because he had a “cutting-edge” sense of humor!
4. Why was the MRI machine so good at solving mysteries? It could always “MRI-veal” the truth!
5. Why did the nurse bring a ruler to work? To measure the “length” of patients’ recoveries!
6. Why did the doctor always bring a deck of cards to rounds? Because he knew how to “deal” with patients!
7. Why was the hospital’s Wi-Fi so fast? Because it had “strong connectivity”!
8. Why did the nurse always carry a map? To navigate through the “arteries” of the hospital!
9. Why did the surgeon wear glasses during surgery? To ensure “sharp” focus!
10. Why did the patient bring a ladder to the hospital? To “climb” up the ranks of health!
11. Why did the doctor carry a stopwatch? To “time” every heartbeat!
12. Why was the hospital’s coffee so popular? Because it had a “pulse-pounding” flavor!
13. Why did the nurse always bring a mirror to work? To reflect on her “scrubs-ess”!
14. Why did the hospital invest in solar panels? To ensure “sun”-stantial energy savings!
15. Why did the surgeon carry a tape measure? To ensure every incision was “spot-on”!
16. Why did the MRI machine win an award? Because it had the “magnet”-ism!
17. Why did the nurse bring a calculator to work? To “sum” up the patient’s condition!
18. Why did the doctor carry a compass? To always find the “right direction” in treatment!
19. Why was the hospital’s security so tight? Because they were always “guarding” the health!
20. Why did the patient bring a dictionary to the hospital? To “define” their recovery!

1. Why did the hospital hire a gardener? Because they needed to grow some “bedside manners”!
2. What do you call a doctor who fixes websites? A URLologist!
3. Why did the nurse bring a red pen to work? In case she needed to draw blood!
4. Why did the MRI machine break up with the CT scanner? They just couldn’t find any common “imaging”!
5. What do you call a skeleton in the hospital closet? The radiologist’s “ex-ray”!
6. Why did the germ go to medical school? To become a “virus” specialist!
7. Why don’t doctors trust stairs? Because they’re always up to something!
8. What did the thermometer say to the other medical equipment? “You guys just don’t have the same ‘degree’ of coolness as me!”
9. Why did the doctor carry a red pen? In case they needed to “mark” an emergency!
10. What did one hospital room say to the other? “I feel so ‘bed’-ridden today!”
11. Why did the nurse always carry a red crayon? To draw blood!
12. Why did the hospital start a band? Because they had so many “patients” waiting for their next gig!
13. What do you call a fake noodle in the hospital? An “impasta”!
14. Why did the doctor carry a ladder? Because they were aiming for “high” blood pressure!
15. Why was the computer cold in the hospital? It left its Windows open!
16. Why did the nurse carry a dictionary? To understand all the “medical terms”!
17. Why don’t surgeons play hide and seek? Because good luck finding someone in scrubs!
18. Why did the doctor carry a map? In case they needed to “chart” a patient’s course to recovery!
19. Why did the skeleton go to the hospital alone? Because he had “nobody” to go with him!
20. Why was the doctor always calm? Because they had “patients” of steel!

1. Why did the doctor carry a ladder to work? Because he heard the hospital was raising its patients’ spirits!
2. What do you call a hospital that’s also a hotel? A “pillow-inn”!
3. Why did the nurse always carry a red pen? In case she needed to draw blood at a moment’s notice!
4. How do surgeons communicate during surgery? They use “operation” signals!
5. Why did the skeleton go to the hospital? Because he had a “bone to pick” with the doctor!
6. What do you call a surgeon with a sense of humor? A “cut-up”!
7. Why was the hospital so crowded? Because it had a “stethoscope” jam!
8. Why don’t hospitals ever get cold? Because they have too many “fever” patients!
9. What did the doctor say to the invisible man who came in for a check-up? “I can’t see you right now!”
10. Why did the MRI machine break up with the X-ray machine? Because it found someone more magnetic!
11. What’s a hospital’s favorite music genre? “Operation Symphony”!
12. Why did the patient bring a ladder to the hospital? He heard the food was on the top floor!
13. What do you call a fake noodle in the hospital? An “impasta”!
14. Why did the doctor carry a map in the hospital? Because he wanted to find his “patient’s location”!
15. Why did the nurse always carry a watch? To make sure patients were getting their “second opinions”!
16. What’s a surgeon’s favorite kind of tree? A “suture pine”!
17. Why did the germ go to the hospital? It wanted to find a “sick” friend!
18. Why was the doctor always calm in the hospital? Because he had “patients”!
19. What did the MRI machine say to the patient? “I’ve got you covered from head to toe!”
20. Why don’t doctors ever play hide and seek in the hospital? Because good luck finding a good “hiding spleen”!

1. Why did the teddy bear bring band-aids to the hospital? Because he heard they were having a “bear-y” busy day!
2. What do you call a fish in a hospital? A “sturgeon”!
3. Why did the crayon go to the hospital? It felt “colorless”!
4. What’s a skeleton’s favorite game in the hospital? “Operation”!
5. Why did the banana go to the hospital? It wasn’t peeling well!
6. What did the doctor say to the toy patient? “Time for your plush examination!”
7. Why was the hospital so noisy? Because the toys were having a “wheely” good time!
8. Why did the puzzle go to the hospital? It felt like it was “missing” something!
9. What’s a frog’s favorite part of the hospital? The “croak-ery” department!
10. Why did the stuffed animal need surgery? It had a “stuffing” leak!
11. What did the crayon say to the band-aid in the hospital? “Stick with me, and we’ll be colorful together!”
12. Why did the toy truck go to the hospital? It needed a “wheel alignment”!
13. What’s a unicorn’s favorite room in the hospital? The “magical recovery” ward!
14. Why was the hospital so crowded with toys? Because it was “operation playtime”!
15. What did the doll say to the nurse in the hospital? “I’m stuffed with love and a bit of fluff!”
16. Why did the robot visit the hospital? It had a “malfunction” in its circuits!
17. What did the doll say to the toy car in the hospital? “Let’s race to recovery!”
18. Why did the puppet need a check-up? It had a case of “string-itis”!
19. What’s a toy’s favorite part of the hospital? The “play” therapy room!
20. Why did the toy airplane go to the hospital? It had a “nose dive”!

1. Why did the doctor become a gardener? Because he wanted to “reap” what he sows in the operating room!
2. What’s a nurse’s favorite type of music? “IV” therapy!
3. Why did the skeleton refuse to go to the hospital? He didn’t have the “guts” for it!
4. What’s a doctor’s favorite exercise? “Cross-checking” symptoms!
5. Why was the surgeon always calm? Because he had a “suture” disposition!
6. Why did the nurse always carry a red pen? In case she needed to “draw” some blood!
7. What’s a hospital’s favorite TV show? “Grey’s Anatomy” reruns!
8. Why was the MRI machine always the center of attention? Because it had a “magnetic” personality!
9. What did the thermometer say to the doctor? “You make me feel so hot!”
10. Why did the nurse wear glasses in the hospital? To “see” better patient outcomes!
11. What’s a surgeon’s favorite dessert? “Slice” of cake!
12. Why did the germ go to the hospital? It was looking for a “sick” new friend!
13. What’s a hospital’s favorite game? “Operation” for sure!
14. Why did the doctor bring a ladder to work? To “raise” the patient’s spirits!
15. What’s a nurse’s favorite kind of humor? “Gallows” humor, of course!
16. Why did the hospital hire a comedian? For some “sick” laughs!
17. What’s a doctor’s favorite fruit? “Cantaloupe” because they’re always “mel-on” the job!
18. Why was the nurse always calm during emergencies? Because she had “patient” demeanor!
19. What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on being awake during surgery? “You’re really cutting it close!”
20. Why was the hospital cafeteria so popular? Because it had “heart-y” meals!

1. Why did the doctor carry a thermometer? Because he wanted to “degree” if the patients were feeling “hot” or “cold”!
2. What did the nurse say to the patient who kept telling jokes? “You’re really raising my ‘punny’ levels!”
3. Why was the skeleton so good at surgery? Because he had a “bone”-afide talent!
4. What do you call a bear in a hospital? A “care”-bear!
5. Why was the MRI machine always tired? Because it had too many “patients” to scan!
6. What’s a hospital’s favorite food? “Organ”-ic vegetables!
7. Why did the doctor become an artist? Because he wanted to draw “blood” in a different way!
8. Why was the hospital bed always in a hurry? Because it wanted to “spring” into action!
9. What did the nurse say to the patient who complained about the food? “Don’t worry, it’s just a ‘taste’ of what’s to come!”
10. Why did the hospital hire a gardener? Because they wanted to “plant” the seeds of good health!
11. What did the doctor say to the patient who kept making jokes during surgery? “You’re really ‘cutting’ up in here!”
12. Why did the nurse bring a ladder to work? In case she needed to “step up” her patient care!
13. What’s a hospital’s favorite sport? “Bed”-minton!
14. Why did the thermometer go to school? It wanted to “measure” up to its potential!
15. Why was the stethoscope always so happy? Because it got to “listen” to people’s hearts!
16. What did the doctor say to the patient who was afraid of needles? “Don’t worry, I’ll ‘point’ you in the right direction!”
17. Why did the hospital hire a magician? Because they wanted to “pull off” some amazing recoveries!
18. What’s a nurse’s favorite accessory? A “pat-ient” watch!
19. Why did the x-ray machine go on vacation? It needed some “rays” of sunshine!
20. What did the doctor say to the patient who asked for a second opinion? “Sure, my opinion is still the same – you’re in good hands!”

1. Why did the cheese go to the hospital? It was feeling “bleu”!
2. What’s a cheese’s favorite room in the hospital? The “cheddar” ward!
3. Why did the cheese need surgery? It had a “grate” injury!
4. What did the cheese say to the doctor? “I’m feeling ‘wheely’ gouda!”
5. Why was the cheese afraid to go under the knife? It didn’t want to be “shredded”!
6. What do you call cheese that’s been injured? “Curdle-y”!
7. Why did the cheese refuse medication? It was afraid of becoming “blue-pill”!
8. What did the cheese say to the patient? “Brie well soon!”
9. Why did the cheese visit the hospital gift shop? It wanted to “cheddar” up!
10. What’s a cheese’s favorite hospital TV show? “The Gouda Doctor”!
11. Why did the cheese need an ambulance? It was “crumblin’!”
12. What’s a cheese’s favorite medical procedure? “Mold” removal!
13. Why was the cheese so popular in the hospital? It had a lot of “whey” with the nurses!
14. What did the cheese say to the MRI machine? “You’re giving me ‘swiss’ vibrations!”
15. Why did the cheese get an X-ray? It wanted to see if it had a “grate” future!
16. What’s a cheese’s favorite game to play in the hospital? “Cheese” chess!
17. Why was the cheese always calm in the hospital? It had a “brie-zen” attitude!
18. What’s a cheese’s favorite medical instrument? The “provo-lone”!
19. Why did the cheese need a nurse? It wanted to be “whey-ted” on hand!
20. What did the cheese say to the doctor who tried to rush its appointment? “Don’t ‘brie’ in a hurry!”

Share a laugh !