Share a laugh !

1. Why did the Guyanese man bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
2. How does a Guyanese fisherman communicate? He drops a line and waits for a byte!
3. Why was the Guyanese computer cold? It left its Windows open!
4. Why did the Guyanese chef get promoted? Because he knew how to curry favor!
5. Why did the Guyanese tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
6. How does a Guyanese barber make his customers happy? He gives them a fade-away!
7. Why was the Guyanese math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
8. Why did the Guyanese golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
9. How does a Guyanese astronaut communicate in space? He uses Guyanese satellites!
10. Why did the Guyanese banana go to school? To learn its ABCs (Anybody Can Peel Banana)!
11. Why did the Guyanese tomato win the race? Because it was a head (lettuce) of the competition!
12. How does a Guyanese farmer mend his pants? With cabbage patches!
13. Why was the Guyanese dictionary so strong? Because it had a lot of definition!
14. Why did the Guyanese musician bring a ladder to the concert? Because he wanted to reach new heights!
15. Why was the Guyanese clock stressed? It had too many ticks and tocks to keep track of!
16. How does a Guyanese baker greet his customers? With a friendly “Bread-y or not, here I crumb!”
17. Why did the Guyanese kangaroo go to school? Because it wanted to be a jumper cable!
18. Why did the Guyanese sailor bring a map to bed? So he could find his way to dreamland!
19. Why did the Guyanese smartphone go to therapy? It had too many apps and needed to de-stress!
20. How does a Guyanese comedian make people laugh? With his Georgetown wit!

1. Why did the Guyanese man bring a spoon to the movie theater? Because he heard it was a stirring performance!
2. How does a Guyanese cat apologize? It says, “Meow-culpa!”
3. Why did the Guyanese banana go to therapy? Because it was feeling a bit bruised!
4. How does a Guyanese pirate say hello? “Arrr, welcome aboard, meh hearties!”
5. Why did the Guyanese football team bring string to the game? So they could tie the score!
6. How does a Guyanese bee address its queen? “Your Majesty-Bee!”
7. Why was the Guyanese dictionary so popular? Because it had all the “word” on the street!
8. How does a Guyanese astronaut eat his cereal? With gravitational pull!
9. Why did the Guyanese chicken join a band? Because it had drumsticks!
10. How does a Guyanese ghost say goodbye? “I’ll be haunting you later!”
11. Why did the Guyanese chef get arrested? He was caught stealing hearts with his cooking!
12. How does a Guyanese kangaroo introduce itself? “Hoppy to meet ya!”
13. Why did the Guyanese tomato refuse to fight? Because it didn’t want to end up in a stew!
14. How does a Guyanese tree communicate? It leaves messages!
15. Why did the Guyanese soccer player bring string to the game? So he could tie up loose ends!
16. How does a Guyanese fisherman stay warm? By drinking a lot of fish tea!
17. Why did the Guyanese comedian go to the doctor? He had a case of the giggles!
18. How does a Guyanese scientist write a love letter? With a lot of chemistry!
19. Why did the Guyanese smartphone go to school? It wanted to improve its reception!
20. How does a Guyanese musician make a living? By playing reggae-geese music!

1. Why did the Guyanese mathematician bring a ruler to the beach? To measure the sine of the times!
2. How does a Guyanese scientist freshen his breath? With a mentos-thesis!
3. Why was the Guyanese poet always calm? Because he knew how to keep his verse under pressure!
4. How does a Guyanese detective solve crimes? He follows the case like he follows cricket scores!
5. Why did the Guyanese artist go to jail? Because he refused to draw the line!
6. How does a Guyanese philosopher greet people? With a “Descartes before the horse!”
7. Why was the Guyanese comedian also a great chef? Because he knew how to deliver punchlines and punches in his cooking!
8. How does a Guyanese engineer express emotions? By applying the right torque to his feelings!
9. Why was the Guyanese astronaut a hit at parties? Because he always brought the space jam!
10. How does a Guyanese musician describe his love life? It’s like a symphony – full of highs and lows but always in harmony!
11. Why did the Guyanese philosopher refuse to share his food? Because he believed in the principle of “mine over matter”!
12. How does a Guyanese inventor relax? He takes a break and brainstorms under the coconut trees!
13. Why was the Guyanese teacher always calm during exams? Because she believed in the theorem of students – they’ll find their own way eventually!
14. How does a Guyanese architect make jokes? He builds them up layer by layer until the punchline supports itself!
15. Why did the Guyanese detective always solve mysteries? Because he had a keen sense of guyanosity – he could sniff out trouble anywhere!
16. How does a Guyanese chef handle criticism? With a pinch of salt and a dash of wit!
17. Why did the Guyanese banker always carry a calculator? Because he knew interest rates could compound quickly!
18. How does a Guyanese writer find inspiration? By exploring the depths of the Demerara!
19. Why was the Guyanese comedian also a great gardener? Because he knew how to plant jokes and watch them grow!
20. How does a Guyanese entrepreneur make decisions? By weighing the pros and cons like a balance scale!

1. Why did the Guyanese banana go to school? To learn how to peel out of tough situations!
2. How does a Guyanese computer greet you? With a byte and a smile!
3. Why was the Guyanese tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing!
4. Why did the Guyanese musician carry a ladder? To reach those high notes!
5. Why was the Guyanese chef always calm? Because he knew how to keep his cool in the kitchen!
6. How does a Guyanese fisherman communicate? He just drops a line and reels them in!
7. Why did the Guyanese smartphone go to therapy? It had too many apps and needed to de-stress!
8. Why did the Guyanese clock get tired? It had too many ticks and tocks to keep up with!
9. How does a Guyanese barber make his customers happy? With a fade-away!
10. Why did the Guyanese golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
11. Why was the Guyanese dictionary so muscular? Because it had a lot of definition!
12. How does a Guyanese astronaut talk in space? He just uses Guyanese satellites!
13. Why was the Guyanese tomato fast? It wanted to ketchup with the other vegetables!
14. Why was the Guyanese kangaroo smart? Because it knew how to hop to it!
15. How does a Guyanese baker greet his customers? With a “Bread-y or not, here I crumb!”
16. Why did the Guyanese tomato win the race? Because it was a head (lettuce) of the competition!
17. Why did the Guyanese farmer always have great parties? Because he knew how to turnip the music!
18. How does a Guyanese comedian make people laugh? With his Georgetown wit!
19. Why was the Guyanese sailor always calm? Because he knew how to navigate the waves!
20. Why did the Guyanese smartphone need glasses? It couldn’t find its contacts!

1. Why did the Guyanese potato break up with his girlfriend? Because she kept mashing his heart.
2. How did the Guyanese farmer fix his broken tractor? He gave it some sugarcane juice and told it to “turn over, bai.”
3. Why was the Guyanese math book sad? Because it had too many problems, man.
4. What did the Guyanese geologist say when he found gold? “Dis nah just luck, dis is rich, bai.”
5. Why did the Guyanese chef go to therapy? Because he had too much beef with himself.
6. How did the Guyanese cat apologize? It said, “Mi sowwy, miow.”
7. Why did the Guyanese phone go to school? It wanted to be smart like a smartphone.
8. What did the Guyanese banana say to the plantain? “Yuh looking ripe, bai.”
9. Why did the Guyanese frog bring a suitcase? It was going on a hop-liday.
10. What did the Guyanese painter say to the canvas? “Yuh looking blank, bai. Lemme mek yuh beautiful.”
11. Why was the Guyanese calendar unhappy? Because it was always getting dates wrong.
12. How did the Guyanese basketball team win the game? They had a lot of net practice, bai.
13. Why did the Guyanese ghost go to the party? Because he heard there would be spirits.
14. What did the Guyanese pirate say when he found treasure? “Dis be more dan gold, dis be our future.”
15. Why was the Guyanese river cold? Because it had too many ice-landers.
16. How did the Guyanese taxi driver find his way? He followed the rumble strips like breadcrumbs, bai.
17. Why was the Guyanese garden so noisy? Because the potatoes and carrots were having a root party.
18. What did the Guyanese computer say to the user? “Yuh click pun mi heart, bai.”
19. Why was the Guyanese football team so good at defense? Because they knew how to block out distractions like dem rivals.
20. How did the Guyanese comedian greet the audience? “Wah gwaan, everybody? Ready fi some good laffs?”

1. Why did the Guyanese banana go to school?
   Because it wanted to be a “plantain” in the classroom!
2. Why was the Guyanese clock always hungry?
   Because it went back four seconds every time it ticked!
3. What did the Guyanese cheese say to the mirror?
   “Halloumi?”
4. Why was the Guyanese pencil always broke?
   Because it kept getting “lead” astray!
5. Why did the Guyanese tomato turn red?
   Because it saw the salad dressing!
6. What did the Guyanese umbrella say to the rain?
   “Stop pouring, I’m getting “soaked” of you!”
7. Why did the Guyanese smartphone go to school?
   Because it wanted to improve its “cell-fie”!
8. Why was the Guyanese music note always happy?
   Because it could “beat” any bad day!
9. What did the Guyanese shoe say to the foot?
   “You “heel” me?”
10. Why did the Guyanese bicycle fall over?
    Because it was “tired” of standing!
11. Why did the Guyanese tomato win the race?
    Because it was a “head” (lettuce) of the competition!
12. What did the Guyanese rug say to the floor?
    “You’re under my “carpet” when it comes to jokes!”
13. Why did the Guyanese banana get elected class president?
    Because it promised to “ape-peel” to everyone!
14. What did the Guyanese bed say to the pillow?
    “You’re my “rest” friend!”
15. Why was the Guyanese library always busy?
    Because it had a lot of “book-ings”!
16. What did the Guyanese tree say to the wind?
    “You “blow” me away!”
17. Why did the Guyanese candle stop telling jokes?
    Because it kept “burning” out!
18. Why did the Guyanese bicycle go to school?
    Because it wanted to “cycle” through its studies!
19. What did the Guyanese chicken say to the egg?
    “You “crack” me up!”
20. Why was the Guyanese math book sad?
    Because it had too many “problems”!

1. Why did the Guyanese man bring a ladder to the bar?
   Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
2. How does a Guyanese fisherman relax after a long day?
   He kicks back with a cold one and some “fish-tales”!
3. Why did the Guyanese couple bring a map to bed?
   So they could find their way to “dreamland”!
4. Why was the Guyanese smartphone stressed?
   It had too many “apps” and needed a “reboot”!
5. How does a Guyanese mechanic flirt?
   He revs up his engine and asks, “Wanna check my oil?”
6. Why did the Guyanese comedian’s jokes always land?
   Because they were “Georgetown” certified!
7. Why did the Guyanese golfer wear two pairs of pants?
   In case he got a “hole in one”!
8. How does a Guyanese bartender serve drinks?
   With a “rum-punch” of flavor and a dash of charm!
9. Why was the Guyanese dictionary so confident?
   Because it had a “definition” for everything!
10. How does a Guyanese chef handle criticism?
    With a pinch of salt and a dash of “pepper”!
11. Why did the Guyanese sailor always have smooth sailing?
    Because he knew how to navigate the “waves”!
12. How does a Guyanese tailor measure success?
    By the “fit” of his suits and the “seam” of his stitches!
13. Why did the Guyanese musician bring a ladder to the concert?
    Because he wanted to reach “new heights”!
14. How does a Guyanese gardener woo his crush?
    He offers her a bouquet of “blossoms” and a promise of “evergreen” love!
15. Why did the Guyanese banker always carry a calculator?
    Because he knew “interest rates” could “compound” quickly!
16. How does a Guyanese architect build rapport?
    By “constructing” meaningful connections and “designing” lasting friendships!
17. Why did the Guyanese photographer always capture the perfect shot?
    Because he had a “lens” for detail and an “exposure” to beauty!
18. How does a Guyanese novelist plot a bestseller?
    With “twists” and “turns” that keep readers on the edge of their “bookmarks”!
19. Why was the Guyanese gym instructor always in high demand?
    Because he knew how to “muscle” his clients into shape!
20. How does a Guyanese bartender mix cocktails?
    With a “splash” of charisma and a “pour” of passion!

1. Why did the Guyanese man bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
2. How does a Guyanese fisherman communicate? Through shell phones!
3. Why don’t Guyanese ever play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding in dem coconut trees!
4. Why did the Guyanese chef get kicked out of the kitchen? He kept adding pepper to everything, even the ice cream!
5. How do Guyanese vampires greet each other? “Fang-suh, how you doing?”
6. Why did the Guyanese golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
7. Why don’t Guyanese ever gamble in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
8. What did the Guyanese vegetable say to the farmer? “Lime to let me grow!”
9. Why did the Guyanese astronaut bring a suitcase to space? He wanted to travel light!
10. How do Guyanese lions like their meat? Roar-dered!
11. Why did the Guyanese banana go to school? To improve its “a-peel”!
12. Why was the Guyanese dictionary sad? It had too many definitions of “rain.”
13. What did the Guyanese soccer player say to the ball? “You’re really kicking it!”
14. Why did the Guyanese mathematician bring a ladder to the beach? He heard the waves were rising!
15. How does a Guyanese pirate say hello? “Aye, aye, chutney!”
16. Why did the Guyanese computer go to therapy? It had too many “byte-sized” problems!
17. Why did the Guyanese banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well!
18. How does a Guyanese ghost say goodbye? “See you lata, alligata!”
19. Why did the Guyanese beekeeper wear a mesh shirt? To catch the “buzz”!
20. Why did the Guyanese gardener bring a ladder to the garden? To climb up and “see-weed”!

1. Why did the Guyanese cheese refuse to be sliced? Because it wanted to be grated!
2. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours in Guyana? Nacho cheese, man!
3. Why did the Guyanese cheese go to school? To get grated!
4. What did the Guyanese cheese say to the mirror? “Halloumi, is it me you’re looking for?”
5. Why did the Guyanese cheese get an award? Because it was so gouda at being cheesy!
6. How does Guyanese cheese apologize? “I’m sorry, I feta bit too much!”
7. What did the Guyanese cheese say to the butter? “You’re on a roll, mate!”
8. Why was the Guyanese cheese so popular? Because it was always spreading good vibes!
9. How does Guyanese cheese avoid traffic? It takes the express whey!
10. Why did the Guyanese cheese go to the party? Because it heard it was going to be grate!
11. What’s a Guyanese cheese’s favorite type of music? R’n’Brie!
12. Why did the Guyanese cheese sit at the front of the class? It wanted to be the big cheese!
13. How does Guyanese cheese stay in shape? It does curd-ercise!
14. What do you call a Guyanese cheese who’s always late? Swiss cheese – it has too many holes in its schedule!
15. Why did the Guyanese cheese blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!
16. What did the Guyanese cheese say to the wine? “You make me feel grate!”
17. Why did the Guyanese cheese bring a coat to the party? It was feeling a bit bleu!
18. How does Guyanese cheese flirt? It says, “You’re looking cheddar than ever!”
19. Why did the Guyanese cheese go to the art gallery? It wanted to be cultured!
20. What’s the Guyanese cheese’s favorite dance move? The Cha-cha-cheddar!

Share a laugh !