Share a laugh !

1. Why did the Guatemalan banana go to therapy? Because it was feeling unpeeled.
2. How do Guatemalan vampires greet each other? With a fang-tastic “¡Buenas noches!”
3. Why did the Guatemalan soccer team bring string to the game? So they could tie the score.
4. What did the Guatemalan avocado say to the onion? “¡Eres la cebolla de mi ojo!”
5. Why did the Guatemalan smartphone go to school? It wanted to be smarter than its chip.
6. What do you call a Guatemalan magician? A Juan-derful illusionist.
7. Why don’t Guatemalan ghosts haunt soccer stadiums? Because they can’t handle all the boos.
8. How does a Guatemalan skeleton say hello? With a bone-afide “¡Hola!”
9. Why don’t Guatemalan cats play poker? Too many cheetahs.
10. What’s a Guatemalan pirate’s favorite letter? Arrrr-Guatemala!
11. Why did the Guatemalan tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
12. What’s a Guatemalan astronaut’s favorite part of the computer? The space bar.
13. Why did the Guatemalan sun go to school? To get a little brighter.
14. What do you call a Guatemalan tree that tells jokes? A pun-nut tree.
15. Why don’t Guatemalan skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
16. What’s a Guatemalan wizard’s favorite snack? Magic beans.
17. Why was the Guatemalan math book sad? It had too many problems.
18. What do you call a Guatemalan snowman? A “Frio-lito.”
19. Why did the Guatemalan clock get in trouble? It tocked too much.
20. What do you call a Guatemalan chicken crossing the road? ¡Pollo en movimiento!

1. Why did the Guatemalan tomato blush? Because it saw the salsa dancing!
2. What did the Guatemalan squirrel say to its friend? “¡Vamos a nuez-tros negocios!”
3. Why don’t Guatemalan ghosts play hide and seek? Because they’re always behind el cortina.
4. How does a Guatemalan comedian measure success? By the amount of “ja-ja-jas” they get!
5. Why did the Guatemalan banana go to school? To learn its “peelosophy”!
6. What did the Guatemalan taco say to the burrito? “¡No seas jalapeño business!”
7. Why was the Guatemalan broom late for work? It overswept its alarm clock!
8. What do you call a Guatemalan who loves to dance? A salsa verde mover!
9. Why did the Guatemalan musician get kicked out of the band? Because he couldn’t handle the marimba!
10. What did the Guatemalan potato chip say to the salsa? “¡No chip-ping way!”
11. Why don’t Guatemalan cows ever get lost? Because they always know “moo-chacho” they are!
12. How do Guatemalan bees communicate? They use “bee-señales”!
13. Why was the Guatemalan cat so good at chess? Because it always took the “meow-ve”!
14. What’s a Guatemalan superhero’s favorite snack? Just-“ice” League.
15. Why did the Guatemalan bicycle fall over? Because it was “tired” of standing up!
16. What do you call a Guatemalan who’s always nervous? A tremblor!
17. Why did the Guatemalan ghost go to the party? For the “boo”-ze!
18. What do you get when you cross a Guatemalan and a parrot? A “mucho-polly”!
19. Why don’t Guatemalan ants ever get sick? Because they have “ant”-ibodies!
20. What did the Guatemalan math book say to the pencil? “Stop drawing attention to yourself!”

1. Why did the Guatemalan chef refuse to make any more desserts? Because he was tired of flan-ing around!
2. How does a Guatemalan fix a broken chair? With some guac and roll!
3. Why did the Guatemalan athlete always carry a ladder? Because he wanted to reach new heights!
4. What do you call a group of Guatemalan musicians? A marimba-nd!
5. Why did the Guatemalan bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
6. How does a Guatemalan make tea? They use “Mayan” ingenuity!
7. Why did the Guatemalan magician never get hired? Because every trick he did was a quetzal-disaster!
8. Why did the Guatemalan become an artist? Because they knew how to paint the town red… and blue… and white!
9. How does a Guatemalan get around town? They take a “tuk-tuk” turn!
10. Why was the Guatemalan clock always behind? Because it kept getting stuck in Tikal!
11. What do you call a Guatemalan who’s a master of disguise? A “camou-flea”!
12. Why did the Guatemalan banana go to therapy? It was having serious peelings!
13. What did the Guatemalan volcano say to its rival? “Lava nice day!”
14. Why did the Guatemalan farmer bring a ladder to the farm? Because he heard the corn needed a little “ear”-itation!
15. How does a Guatemalan make friends? With a little bit of quetzal-coating!
16. Why did the Guatemalan astronaut bring a tortilla into space? In case he encountered an extra “terrestrial”!
17. What do you call a Guatemalan beekeeper? A “honey connoisseur”!
18. Why did the Guatemalan take a boat to work? Because they wanted to avoid the rush “hour” traffic!
19. Why did the Guatemalan comedian bring a map on stage? Because he wanted to “Guat” to the punchline!
20. What do you call a Guatemalan detective? A “Quetzalcoatlus” investigator!

1. Why did the Guatemalan chef bring a ladder to work? Because they heard the food was out of this world!
2. How does a Guatemalan programmer fix bugs? With a byte of “teco-tal”!
3. Why was the Guatemalan comedian always so successful? Because their jokes were pure “Quetzal-coatl” humor!
4. What do you call a Guatemalan who’s afraid of heights? A “Tikal-tophobic”!
5. Why did the Guatemalan banana go to school? To become a “peeling” expert!
6. How does a Guatemalan decorate for a party? With plenty of “fiesta” flair!
7. Why did the Guatemalan musician always carry a ladder? To reach those high “marimba” notes!
8. What do you call a Guatemalan who’s always late? A “tuk-tuk” tardy!
9. Why did the Guatemalan inventor create a helicopter made of tortillas? Because they wanted to make “flying” tacos!
10. How does a Guatemalan astronaut eat their cereal? With a “space-spoon”!
11. Why did the Guatemalan detective bring a compass to work? To always “Guat” in the right direction!
12. What do you call a Guatemalan who’s excellent at math? A “Quetzal-culator”!
13. Why did the Guatemalan banana get a job at the bank? Because it knew how to “count” on itself!
14. How does a Guatemalan farmer greet their crops? With a “maize-y” hello!
15. Why did the Guatemalan optometrist become so popular? Because they had a knack for “Mayan” good vision!
16. What do you call a Guatemalan who loves to dance? A “Salsa” sensation!
17. Why did the Guatemalan marathon runner always win? Because they had the “quetzal” to go the distance!
18. How does a Guatemalan chef make scrambled eggs? With a little “huevito” of magic!
19. Why did the Guatemalan musician refuse to play in the rain? Because they didn’t want their marimba to get “wet-cal”!
20. What do you call a Guatemalan who’s great at chess? A “Mayan” mastermind!

1. Why did the Guatemalan astronaut bring a ladder to space? Because he heard the moon had great tortillas and he wanted to reach for the stars with salsa!
2. How do Guatemalan birds communicate? They use a language called Quetzaltweets!
3. Why was the Guatemalan chef always calm? Because he knew his food was Guatamazing!
4. What’s a Guatemalan’s favorite type of music? Salsa… because they love things spicy!
5. Why did the Guatemalan farmer bring a ladder to the farm? Because he heard the corn needed ear-raising!
6. How do Guatemalan trees get on the internet? They log in!
7. Why don’t Guatemalan vampires attack tourists? They prefer a bite of homemade atol de elote!
8. What’s a Guatemalan’s favorite exercise? Salsa dancing… it’s a-maize-ing cardio!
9. Why did the Guatemalan mathematician become a gardener? Because he wanted to grow square roots!
10. Why did the Guatemalan banana go to therapy? It was feeling a little too yellow and needed to find its peelings!
11. What did the Guatemalan volcano say to its neighboring volcano? “You rock, but I lava you!”
12. Why did the Guatemalan comedian go to the bakery? To find some pun-chos!
13. How does a Guatemalan organize a space party? They planet!
14. Why don’t Guatemalan ants get sick? Because they have ant-ibodies!
15. Why did the Guatemalan golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
16. Why was the Guatemalan river so good at telling jokes? It had a great flow!
17. What do you call a group of Guatemalan musicians? A marimba band-a!
18. Why did the Guatemalan skeleton go to the party alone? Because it had no body to go with!
19. Why did the Guatemalan computer go to therapy? It had too many bytes of emotional baggage!
20. How does a Guatemalan bartender greet customers? “Hola, amigos! How can I ‘tequila’ help you tonight?”

1. Why did the Guatemalan student bring a pencil to bed? Because he wanted to draw his dreams!
2. What do Guatemalan kids say when they’re excited? “¡Guau, qué chilero!”
3. Why did the Guatemalan kid bring a map to school? Because he wanted to find his way to success!
4. What’s a Guatemalan kid’s favorite subject in school? Math, because they love counting quetzals!
5. Why did the Guatemalan child bring a plant to class? Because he heard it was a “fern-tastic” idea!
6. How does a Guatemalan kid apologize? With a “lo siento mucho” hug!
7. Why don’t Guatemalan kids play hide and seek with mountains? Because they always peak!
8. Why was the Guatemalan child’s report card always wet? Because it was filled with “agua” grades!
9. What do Guatemalan kids use to catch fish? A rod and “reel” enthusiasm!
10. Why did the Guatemalan kid bring a backpack full of beans to school? Because he wanted to be the “bean” in class!
11. What did the Guatemalan child say to the computer? “Hablo español, ¿hablas mouse?”
12. Why did the Guatemalan kid bring a soccer ball to the library? Because he heard it was a quiet “goal” zone!
13. What do Guatemalan kids dream of becoming when they grow up? Quetzal whisperers!
14. Why don’t Guatemalan kids ever get lost? Because they have a “maize” of direction!
15. Why did the Guatemalan child bring a pillow to school? Because he wanted to dream big during naptime!
16. What do you call a group of Guatemalan kids playing soccer? A “futbol” of laughter!
17. Why did the Guatemalan kid put his backpack in the freezer? Because he wanted cold hard facts for homework!
18. How does a Guatemalan kid greet a new friend? With a big “¡Hola, amigo!”
19. Why don’t Guatemalan kids ever get bored? Because they’re always busy exploring new adventures!
20. What did the Guatemalan child say to the taco? “¡Eres el mejor amigo que he tenido!”

1. Why did the Guatemalan adult bring a machete to the party? To slice through the awkwardness!
2. How does a Guatemalan adult start their day? With a cup of café de Guatemala and a side of pan dulce!
3. Why don’t Guatemalan adults play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding with all those volcanoes around!
4. What’s a Guatemalan adult’s favorite pickup line? “¿Eres chapín/a? Porque contigo, mi corazón se siente en casa.”
5. Why did the Guatemalan adult take a fan to the bar? To keep cool while sipping on some Gallo beer!
6. How does a Guatemalan adult tell time? By the smell of tortillas cooking on the comal!
7. Why did the Guatemalan adult go to the mercado? To spice up their life with some fresh chilies!
8. What’s a Guatemalan adult’s favorite hobby? Watching the sunset over Lake Atitlán with a glass of Zacapa rum!
9. Why don’t Guatemalan adults trust stairs? Because they’re always “escalonados”!
10. What did the Guatemalan adult say to their significant other during an argument? “Lo siento, mi amor. Let’s taco ’bout it over some frijoles volteados.”
11. Why was the Guatemalan adult’s phone always on silent? Because they didn’t want to disturb the marimba music!
12. How does a Guatemalan adult impress their date? By cooking a delicious pepián from scratch!
13. Why did the Guatemalan adult bring a hammock to work? For some “siesta” motivation during lunch break!
14. What’s a Guatemalan adult’s favorite guilty pleasure? Binge-watching telenovelas while munching on tostadas con guacamole!
15. Why did the Guatemalan adult cross the border? To spread the joy of tortillas and salsa to the world!
16. How does a Guatemalan adult stay fit? By dancing cumbia and salsa until sunrise!
17. Why don’t Guatemalan adults go camping? Because they already live in the land of eternal spring!
18. What’s a Guatemalan adult’s favorite type of party? A fiesta filled with marimba music and piñatas!
19. Why did the Guatemalan adult become a chef? Because they wanted to share the flavors of Guatemala with the world, one plate of pepián at a time!
20. How does a Guatemalan adult handle stress? With a deep breath of fresh mountain air and a sip of Quetzalteca!

1. Why did the Guatemalan dad bring a ladder to the soccer game? Because he heard the players needed some “high” fives!
2. How does a Guatemalan dad answer the phone? “¿Bueno? ¡Aquí, como la chispa de maíz!”
3. Why did the Guatemalan dad bring a map to the beach? Because he wanted to find the “shore” way!
4. What’s a Guatemalan dad’s favorite type of music? Salsa… because it goes perfectly with chips!
5. Why did the Guatemalan dad wear sunglasses to the barbecue? Because the grill was too “bright”!
6. How does a Guatemalan dad cut wood? With his “huevitos” – that’s Spanish for eggs, but it also means courage!
7. Why don’t Guatemalan dads ever get lost? Because they always have a “maize” of direction!
8. What did the Guatemalan dad say when he couldn’t find the remote? “¡Qué tele-novela sin fin!”
9. Why did the Guatemalan dad bring a spoon to the movie theater? Because he heard it was a “spoon-taneous” outing!
10. How does a Guatemalan dad sign off his emails? “Con cariño, como la leche en la avena.”
11. Why did the Guatemalan dad bring a camera to the zoo? Because he wanted to “capture” the moment with his family!
12. What’s a Guatemalan dad’s favorite fruit? El “banano,” because it’s always “ape-peeling”!
13. Why don’t Guatemalan dads ever get tired? Because they have “sobrada” energy!
14. What did the Guatemalan dad say to his child who wanted a pet snake? “¿Una serpiente? ¡Ni de guasa!”
15. Why did the Guatemalan dad bring a backpack full of beans to the picnic? Because he wanted to “bean” prepared!
16. How does a Guatemalan dad tell jokes? With a side of “frijoles” for extra laughter!
17. Why did the Guatemalan dad bring a rake to the beach? Because he wanted to “leaf” it cleaner than he found it!
18. What’s a Guatemalan dad’s favorite superhero? “El Chapulín Colorado” – because he’s always ready to lend a hand!
19. Why did the Guatemalan dad go to the concert with a ladder? Because he wanted to “climb” the charts!
20. How does a Guatemalan dad show love? With hugs tighter than a tamale!

1. Why did the Guatemalan take a ladder to the party? Because they heard the salsa was on the roof!
2. How does a Guatemalan open a door? With a quetzal key!
3. Why don’t Guatemalans ever play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding with all those colorful textiles!
4. What do you call a Guatemalan magician? A Juan-derful!
5. Why did the Guatemalan bring a pencil to the barbecue? Because they heard it was a skewer-ing experience!
6. How does a Guatemalan like their coffee? Gua-te-mala-tte!
7. Why did the Guatemalan bring a map to the party? Because they heard it was going to be a fiesta!
8. What do you call a Guatemalan beekeeper? A Mayan-keeper!
9. Why did the Guatemalan wear sunglasses? Because their future is so bright, they needed to shade their eyes from all the potential!
10. How does a Guatemalan high-five? With a quetzal palm!
11. Why was the Guatemalan chef a great comedian? Because they always knew how to spice up a joke!
12. What do you call a group of Guatemalan musicians? A marimba-nd!
13. Why did the Guatemalan bring a pillow to the soccer game? Because they heard it was going to be a tie!
14. How does a Guatemalan make pancakes? With Mayan-maple syrup!
15. Why was the Guatemalan computer cold? It left its Windows open!
16. What do you call a Guatemalan who can play every instrument? A Mayaestro!
17. Why did the Guatemalan become an astronaut? Because they wanted to visit the Milky Way and make some galactic atol!
18. How does a Guatemalan write a love letter? With Quetzal kisses!
19. Why did the Guatemalan become a gardener? Because they heard it was a “garden-variety” job!
20. What do you call a Guatemalan who loves spicy food? A caliente connoisseur!

Share a laugh !